Wait. People Make Fun of Cornell?

One of my favorite things about Cornell being in the basketball tournament is that we Cornellians, who otherwise live in a pleasant little bubble, are finally exposed to what the outside world thinks of us. Of, course, most of the jokes center around Andy Bernard.

However, every once in a while you run across stuff that goes beyond that. Like this Missouri blog that did some scouting.

Deadspin also does some of these. Here is last year's preview capsule. Believe it or not, this was the last time Cornell has been mentioned on the site.

Their recommendation for our motto: "Cornell Athletics are here to help grow muscles beyond enormous ass cheeks and thigh muscles people build while hiking up and down the damn hills every day in the snow, like the training scene from Rocky IV, if he was wearing Uggs and lived in Montauk during the summer. We also help minorities survive inhospitable living conditions like constant clouds and rain, during the few weeks it's not snowing."

And their deconstruction of our team logos is priceless.

My favorite, however, has to be this Bill Simmons piece from last year's game against Stanford.

But all of those astounding things paled in comparison to the Cornell cheerleaders, a group that apparently was assembled hastily within 48 hours of the tournament. During the first half, they tried to do one of those pseudo-pyramids in which two groups of three girls lifted two other girls in the air, only one of the girls lost her balance and nearly tumbled face-first to her death before the other girls somehow caught her. Unfortunately, they had to finish their routines for the rest of the game, leading to a terrifying moment where they attempted the pseudo-pyramid again in the second half, only the girl who almost fell the first time had the same petrified look on her face as the babysitter in the last 30 minutes of the "When a Stranger Calls" remake. I don't think I've ever been so scared for someone in my entire life. Somehow they pulled off the pseudo-pyramid, although it was marred a little when the poor girl lost control of her bowels on the three girls holding her up. Just kidding. Again, you have to love March Madness.

It's not the Cornell cheerleaders' fault that they look like a gaggle of fourteen-year olds.

I will link to the new Deadspin preview capsule as soon as it becomes available.