Why my Moot Court Brief is Catastrophically Behind Schedule

Instead of writing my brief, I am IMing friends. In my schedule, I was supposed to have finished it last weekend, and yet here I am, just now reading the case. And yet here I am, procrastinating. I guess that's what mavericks do, you know.

So, when Kristen said her class was boring, I gallantly offered to save her by calling her "from the hospital," thus giving her an excuse to escape.

Why would I be in the hospital, she asked.

This is the story I came up with:

So I tried to steal honey. From a beehive. And got attacked. By the bees, not by PETA people. So I got attacked. And ran into a bear. Who beat me up. For stealing his honey. I was hurt. So I broke into a pharmacy. To get band-aids. But I got caught. So I was arrested. And I went to jail. Again. So, in jail, I tried to escape. But I tunneled the wrong way. When I came up, I hit my head. Because I came up in the warden's office. Under his desk. So he got spooked. And kicked me in the teeth. So I bit him in the leg. Then I took him hostage. So I escaped. In my excitement, I ran into a wall. This knocked myself out. So here I am. In the hospital.

And, all while I pen this Pulitzer Prize winner, time ticks away.

Update: After 6 hours in the library, I have actually managed to do some "work." Now all that remains of my brief is finding the cases, reading the cases, figuring out my argument, outlining my argument, writing my argument, re-reading the cases to find law that supports my argument, incorporating the law into my argument, and re-writing my argument. Oh, and formatting. Yay sleep!