Happy Thanksgiving

Happy Turkey Day, everybody!

That expression has always struck me as a bit of a misnomer. I have yet to see a happy turkey on Thanksgiving. Mostly, they are melancholy, or angry and paranoid. And, really, can you blame them?



With the stupid joke out of the way, I can go on to list what I'm grateful for.

Friends and family, without whom the friends and family discount, so integral a part of the narcotics baron, would not exist.

Cows, who, because they are the tastiest of the animals, are my favorite of the animals. Without them, there would be no steaks, prime ribs, skirt steaks, flank steaks, strip steaks, T-Bones, Rib-eyes, filet mignons, roast beef, brisket, cheesesteaks, beef jerky, hamburgers, cheeseburgers, bacon cheeseburgers, double bacon cheeseburgers, or any other of the vast array of hamburgers that are so plentiful in this land of, um, plenty.

Beers, Wines, and Spirits, all integral parts of the Hotel Administration major at Cornell, and all also integral parts of the clouding of one's judgment.

The Simpsons, South Park, Family Guy and Will Ferrell movies, without which my conversations would be much, much more silent.

Sports, like baseball, football, and beer pong.

Breakfast, lunch, and dinner, three of most important meals of the day.

And now, I am off, to make myself some steak. I always have steak instead of turkey on Thanksgiving. Turkey, the blandest of the meats, is an acceptable food. However, if we are going to be grateful about food, it stands to reason that we should consume the best of the foods. Thus, steak, the background on my iPhone and the reason I become emotional, on occasion, at steakhouses.