Avert Your Eyes, Children

Everyone always thinks I am exaggerating when I tell them that the BU Law Tower is the ugliest building I've ever seen. But I'm not kidding. It's like something that the set designer for Blade Runner nixed because it was too ugly and depressing.

The mainstream liberal elite media has decided to weigh in on this race for the bottom. An independent travel site has made a list of the ugliest buildings in the world, and has bestowed upon Boston's own City Hall the dubious honor of being the most unbecoming bridesmaid at the reception.

City Hall is considered Boston's shining example of the Brutalist school of architecture. When referring to it as the prime example of this particular architectural style, however, most negect to include in that list the uglier stepsister that is The Boston University School of Law. Forgetting to list the Tower of Terror in the list of Ugliest Buildings is like omitting either Jennifer Lopez or George W. Bush in the "Biggest Ass" category, depending on what magazine you publish.

I mean, look at it. It's like they gave a blind kid rusty Legos and asked him to put something together. Then, while he was struggling with the pieces, they put a bucket on his head and kept hitting it with a shovel. Then, when he was done, they took his confection and exploded some dynamite next to it using what scientists call the "Wile E. Coyote Principle of Explosives." That is, using a blast small enough to not cause substantial damage,but nevertheless strong enough to critically affect the facade.

Perhaps I exaggerate. But then, again, the photograph doesn't really do it justice. Much like you have to stand at the edge of the Grand Canyon to truly comprehend its grandeur, you have to see the Law Tower to fully understand the scope of its horrors. The windowless 1L dungeons of the 5th and 6th floor, the exposed pipes, the rusty steel outcroppings (seriously, does a can of paint cost that much?), the hopeless, desperate wanderings of its inmates students, who know that besides final exams, looking for a job in this terrific economy, and the never-ending stress, they now also have to contend with the fact that the law tower's most salient feature -- its soul-crushing hideousness -- is not even officially recognized. I demand a recount.