Freedom from Frenchy

Well, that was an eventful first half. The Braves have had a thoroughly mediocre first half a sit 2 games under .500 and 6 games out of first in the NL East. We've had very good pitching, but our batting has been worse than we could have imagined. Here's a tidy recap of this half season, courtesy of a Braves blogger:

So, what are we dealing with here? Well, our worst hitters play left field and first base, our biggest power threat hits leadoff, our shortstop is leading the team in RBI even though he got benched for a week for general douchiness, the offense of late has been carried by a man who started the year as the second-string utility infielder, our hotshot rookie CF spent two months on the team without ever revealing that he might have a broken wrist, our cleanup hitter found out a month into the season that he needs glasses, we have two pitchers in the top ten in ERA and both of them have losing records, our putative ace has the worst ERA in the rotation, three relievers are on pace to challenge a team record in appearances, and some people wonder if our Hall of Fame manager has Alzheimer’s. On the other hand, Francoeur is now a Met. Call it even.

It's true. Everything pales in comparison to the subtraction of Francouer, the most frustrating player I've seen don a Braves uniform since, well, ever. Seriously, he sucks at a level of suckitude unimagined by even the suckiest of sucks who have bestowed their suckage on an unfortunate world.

My favorite part is the Mets' reaction at his signing: They seem pretty concerned at the fact that there were message board parades all over Atlanta. As in, "should we be worried that they're dancing in the streets?"

Why are we so happy? Because Francouer was so bad we wouldn't have wished him on our worst enemy. And then, when he was actually traded to our worst enemy, we realized that those who claim they wouldn't wish something bad on their worst enemies have no idea what they're talking about. Now, unburdened by the greatest albatross that has ever worn a Braves uniform -- seriously, the man is historically bad -- we are primed to make a run at the division.

Enjoy Frenchy, Mets fans. It couldn't have happened to nicer fans.