The transcript of Marcus Schrenker's mayday communication that was obtained by The Daily Show is as brilliant as always.
Schrenker: Mayday! Mayday!
Air Traffic: Okay, Piper 250, we hear your transmission. What is the problem?
Schrenker: My plane is, um, having flying problems! With the wings!
Air Traffic: Roger. Could you be more specific?
Schrenker: Uh... I'm under attack!
Air Traffic: Okay. Who is attacking you?
Schrenker: Bees! Bzzz! Bees!
Air Traffic: Uh-huh.
Schrenker: Oh no! The door's open! The wind's getting in! Woooosh! Wooosh! And a lion! Roaaaar! And uh ... oh no! It's the ghost of Redd Fox! "I'm coming, Elizabeth!" I'm, uh, crashing! Crash!
Air Traffic: Piper 250, are you OK?
Schrenker: No. I'm badly dead. Don't investigate. Over.
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