Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Captain Jetes and the Unholy Uproar

I have been asked to comment on the Derek Jeter winning a Gold Glove fiasco of yesterday. Of course, it is an atrocious choice. I have not been this fake outraged about something since Shakespeare in Love somehow beat out Saving Private Ryan for the Best Picture Oscar in 1998.

Look, the Gold Gloves are as legitimate as the Grammy Awards. If Homer Simpson can win a Grammy, then so can you. Anyone who follows baseball knows that Jeter is not an adequate shortstop -- he only had six errors because he could only get to about six ground balls -- and our minds won't change no matter how many Gold Gloves they throw at him.

The choice of Derek Jeter is indefensible. When I heard about it, I thought people were messing with me. Enough so that I had to check Baseball Reference, which published the full list with no additional comment except for an addendum right after Jeter's name stating (we can't believe it either). As someone else mentioned, there'd be less of an uproar if Jeter had won the Nobel Peace Prize.

I think Ken Tremendous, as usual, nailed it when he tweeted, "Oh, he shouldn’t be paid $25 million a year to play shortstop? Tell that to the GOLD GLOVE HE JUST WON!” Of course he's just being facetious, but that's how some people argue. Fortunately, those people have just gotten fired from ESPN. Eventually, they'll all be extinct, and we can all stop angrily tweeting about them.

The final word should, as usual, go to Joe Posnanski, who wrote his usual thoughtful and original comment about The Jeter Question. If you were a Yankee, would you trade Jeter for Hanley Ramirez? Read through the whole article. The end will blow your mind, guaranteed. It won't blow your mind as much as Jeter winning the Gold Glove, but close.

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