Martha Choke-ly

Imagine, if you will, that you are about to get married. And everything is all set, the cake has been chosen, the bridesmaids have been fitted, the priest has been chosen, the vows have been written, and so on. The ceremony is ready to go. Tomorrow, you are getting married. You go to bed, heave a contented sigh, and close your eyes.

And then you wake up in Reno. And you're wearing your pants, but missing your underwear. Half your hair is pink, the other half is gone. There seems to be a tattoo on your back but you can't really see it, but from what you can sort of tell, it seems to be somebody's face. Policemen are set outside in the motel's parking lot, all pointing their gun at your room's door, and when you turn on the TV, the President is giving a press conference and it's about you.

And all you can do is look around in wide-eyed horror and choke out:

WHAT JUST HAPPENED?

That's what it feels like for Democrats in Massachusetts today. Somehow, incredibly, the seat that Teddy Kennedy just held for 46 was lost by the Democratic party. And it wasn't lost by a little. They got rolled like the Washington Generals. It wasn't even close.

At this point the outcome is not surprising. Last week, however, I told someone that if Scott Brown won, I'd eat my hat. Goddamnit. Now I have to eat my hat. I don't have a hat. I have to buy one now. If anyone out there has any experience eating hats, please let me know. I'm looking for an easily digestible one.

I don't really know what to say. I think Jon Stewart said it best.

Martha Coakley was one competent campaign away from being BU Law's most accomplished graduate. Now? She's Bill Buckner. Worse, perhaps.

I assume that, to the rest of the country, Massachusetts now looks like that guy who was bringing the keg to the party, but then accidentally broke the tap, and now there's nowhere to get a new tap, so I guess there won't be a party.

Um.

(Kicks at dirt).

Sorry?